Let’s start with a “Thank You!”

Thank you for clicking on this post! Thank me for writing it! What else can I say thank you for? 😊

When I wake up each morning, I consciously try to make the first thought in my head something to be thankful for. God, thanks for giving me another day. Thanks for a great wife and family. It’s not too hard to think of something. The point is that saying thanks or being grateful isn’t just about expressing kindness or gratitude towards someone else. It’s also about doing that for me.

A few years ago my employer brought in a motivational speaker to talk about happiness (check out his TED talk here). At first, I wasn’t too thrilled to sit through the talk, since I thought it would just be someone else promoting a book about how I could become more productive on the job (aren’t I the cynical one!). But this guy was different. Sure, parts of his talk were about on the job stuff, but he also made some points that caught my attention. When we’re grateful about something, we feel better. Compliments don’t just benefit those who receive them – they’re just as good for those who give them too. So why aren’t we more grateful about things?

I tell my kids all the time that we frame our own reality. If we think things will turn out badly, they probably will. But conversely, if we think things might go in our favor – even if they don’t – we still come away with fewer bruises than we might otherwise. In ACT, they have a fancy term called “defusion”, which really just means we shouldn’t get caught up in all the bad thoughts our mind is feeding us, since in the end it’s just a bunch of hot air (look here for an article from Stephen Hayes on the topic). Choosing to be grateful about things helps us to defuse, and allows us to take better charge of our circumstance. And it’s easy to do!

So the next time life is getting you down, think of something or someone to be grateful for. And let them know it too. It will do you both a world of good.

What are you thankful for?